Most Mums are great at giving advice, from ‘don’t over-pluck your eyebrows’, to ‘never kiss on the first date’, their wealth of knowledge provides us with the tools to succeed in both life and love. Sometimes, there are things that Mum aren’t able to prepare you for, so we gathered six wedding experts to uncover the one thing that they wished their own Mothers had told them before they got married.
Believe it or not, I wish that my parents had argued in front of me. A lot of experts say nowadays that it’s important for the Mother and Father to resolve disagreements or issues in front of their children, as it teaches them problem-solving skills and how to compromise. My parents were the type that did this behind closed doors, so I never got to see that side of a marriage until my husband and I had our first disagreement.
Despite how hard you try, you can’t change or save everyone.
There is nothing really specific I wish my mother told me. Every relationship and path each couple takes is different. But I did always looked at my parents’ marriage, and the love they have for one another. I always told myself ”I hope I’m lucky enough to marry a great man like my Father” who until this day, still holds my Mother’s hand while shopping and cares so much for his family. And I’m happy to say that I have found that man in my life, my husband Patrick. So maybe I didn’t get the hand holding while shopping, but apart from that he is a wonderful, loving and caring husband who is my Best Friend.
I wish my own Mother told me that marriage is a never ending job. Every day we need to work on our relationship, on our friendship, on our communication.
The perfect marriage needs to have an aspect of independence, but you also need to rely on each other completely. If you’ve got so much independence that you and your husband don’t need each other, it can make it too easy to get out of a marriage when the times get tough. Then again, if you need to leave a marriage for your own safety and that of your children, it’s a different story.
I grew up in a violent household and my Mother put up with a lot from my Father. I was determined not to be my Mother, but I ended up putting up with the same amount that she put up with. I wish she’d been far more fierce in her relationship and stood up for herself. I now have a daughter who’s in a serious relationship and I’ll be the first to let her know what she should and shouldn’t stand for in her relationship.
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