“What are the tiny things to consider before marrying someone that most people normally ignore?,” Reddit user u/pizzalover 13 recently asked. The thread went crazy with hundreds of suggestions that all really seem like HUGE things to consider when you think about them.
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Marriage is no easy feat and you really need to know the person before you go into this lifelong commitment because it’s not all rainbows and sunshine…
Here are some of the suggestions Reddit users gave in response to the question and what we think about them.
Do you get along with the in-laws?
You may think you’re just marrying your partner but that is not the case! You need to make sure you have a decent relationship with your in-laws for yourself and your partner. It is so important to feel like you are part of their family even if you rarely see or interact with them. A good relationship with your in-laws means having support, and they are going to be in a part of your life whether you like it or not.
Do you have compatible goals?
This one covers everything from career goals to family goals… You need to know where your partner stands. Do you want to have children? Do you need dual income? Would you move locations for the sake of your partner’s career? These are all conversations you and your partner need to be having, and consider before marrying.
It is so integral that you understand each other’s wants and needs, and what you want for each other and from each other before you embark on this lifelong commitment.
Are you okay with each other’s spending habits?
We all know the saying, ‘Money is the root of all evil’… Everybody is different when it comes to their spending habits. Some like to save and some don’t and there is no wrong way here. The only thing you need to do is ensure you and your partner are aware and understanding of each others’ spending habits. It’s unfortunate, but many issues in marriages come from financial roots and so making sure you have these conversations with each other will help you later down the road.
Personal hygiene habits
Living with someone who doesn’t reflect the same hygiene standards as yourself can be very difficult and frustrating. In the early days of your marriage, it may seem like a minor difference but after years of the same thing over again, it can definitely develop into an issue that is much bigger. Remember you are going to be with this person forever, so personal hygiene is actually quite important and you must consider it before marrying.
Their everyday reaction to your presence
Even though you’ve known each other for a very long time and these little things seem trivial, acknowledging one another every day means constant reassurance that you are loved and appreciated. Nobody wants to be ignored whether in a relationship or not so reacting when your partner enters a room, or smiling when they approach can save you from having a draining marriage.
Has your partner ever apologized to you, or do they have to ‘win’ every argument?
No one is right all the time, and if either you or your partner can’t admit wrongness or bend at all, that’s a terrible sign for your future and you should consider it before marrying. It is in human nature to make mistakes and approach situations remembering that will lay the foundations for a smoother ride.
Have you seen your partner stressed? Or has your relationship been stressed?
Stress is an emotion that we all succumb to at one point or another, there’s no escape. It’s how your partner deals with stress and how you act to support them. If your relationship hasn’t been stressed, you should consider it before marrying because you don’t know how you’re going o deal with the situation when it comes after you’ve entered in this lifelong commitment. Bumps along the road are completely normal in any relationship, not experiencing them can seem a little suspicious.
The way your partner treats strangers
It says a lot about their character. Rudeness to staff, taxi drivers, customers etc. will give you a glimpse of your partners’ true colours.
How do they deal with an attraction to others?
Experiencing attraction to people outside your relationship is a very fragile topic and needs to be discussed with each other before you consider marrying. You must set boundaries and respect each other so that attraction will not be an issue. Being open and honest is the best way to go about it.
Personal space and individuality
It is so crucial that you have the freedom to be yourself within a relationship. You don’t need to share everything. You can have your own personal space where you do things that help you express your individuality and you need to provide the same for your partner.
Related article: 19 Things Every Maid Of Honour Needs To Know, 20 Important Wedding Planning Tips
