Ahhh, the good ole’ Wedding guest list; Brides will tell you it’s one of the trickiest parts of organising their Big Day. Suddenly you go from having a close knit group of family and friends, to having an entire neighbourhood knocking at your door, keen to come along.
Whether it’s your Groom, your in-laws or your parents expanding the guest list, you’re probably going to have distant relatives and acquaintances expecting invitations – and sometimes it’s hard to know who you should and shouldn’t have along to your Big Day.
Firstly, have you met this person before? It may seem crazy to some, but I know there are some Brides out there who are pressured by family to invite people they’ve never even spoken to before! As a general rule of thumb, unless you know the person (and know them quite well), you don’t need to have them at your Wedding.
Sometimes you meet someone and have an instant connection with them, becoming best friends almost overnight; however, most of the time it takes years to develop a close relationship with someone. If you’ve known this potential Wedding guest for less than a year, you can consider scratching them.
Work-friends are tricky. You see them almost every day and you probably spend more time with them, than with your hubby-to-be, but should they automatically make the guest list? Ask yourself whether you’d make an effort to regularly see them after you leave your job and if the answer is ‘probably not’, they’re ‘probably not’ going to make it on the guest list!
Whether it’s a family member (ie. cousin) or a friend – if you’re inviting every one of their brothers and sisters, or everyone else in the friendship circle, you should probably suck it up and include them too.
This may seem like an obvious question, but if your relationship with this friend or family member isn’t positive and you don’t enjoy being with them, you might not want them present on the biggest day of your life.
In general, if you’re comfortable enough with someone to call them for a chat, they should make your Wedding guest list. However, if they’re strictly a ‘text-only’ relationship and even then you only get in touch occasionally, they might not be close enough to you to get an invite.
It doesn’t matter if your Wedding is being held a block away from their house; the question you should ask is ‘if we were to Marry overseas, would they go the extra (literal) mile to come?’ – if the answer is yes, they deserve an invite!
This is simple; if you or your Groom couldn’t care less whether they are there on your Wedding Day or not, it’s a ‘no’.
We always recommend the ’10-year rule’. If you haven’t known them for 10 years (and still keep in touch), or you can’t imagine still being friends with them in 10 years’ time, they might not be important enough to warrant an invitation.
Main image from Jessica and Matthew’s Wedding. Photography by The White Tree.
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