Despite his demure start (that rejected kiss), Bachelor Matty J has relinquished his honour after passionate smooch with one of the lucky ladies competing for his affection.
Wednesday night’s episode saw Australia’s new sweetheart lock lips with Georgia Love-lookalike Laura during a romantic sunset picnic by the water. Matty, in classic boy-style, later described the kiss as ‘nice’ (we can hear your collective groans all the way from here, girls).
An earlier scenic river cruise with a bucket of champagne in arm’s reach definitely got the couple staring deeply into each other’s eyes, but Laura wasn’t having any of it after Matty showed her ‘possibly the most offensive thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life’.
The twosome decided to get artistic with a ‘speed life drawing’ session by the water, and despite the Sydney-based Bach telling Laura she had ‘incredible features’, his portrait of her had anything but.
‘Is that just like looking in a mirror?’ gushed Matty after the grand reveal of his Picasso-worthy picture to the none-too-impressed Bachelorette. The Fine Arts graduate, who despite looking like her dreams will be haunted for the rest of her life, took it all in her stride, jokingly telling her possible future hubby that she liked her new ‘Adam’s apple’.
It’s hard not to imagine Laura pulling a mental sassy finger click after showing off her decidedly dreamier portrait complete with a bunch of stick figure Bachelorettes clutching roses in the background.
Despite the ‘artistic differences’, Matty gave Laura one of the best compliments he’s probably ever said, commenting, ‘I kinda thought I did the eyebrows really well – they had this really beautiful kink to it.’ Hey, whatever floats your boat.
Back at the mansion, the other not-so-lucky ladies looked like the cast of a party shop ad in for the medieval-themed group date the producers ‘kindly’ organised for them.
“Henry VIII had six wives. So only six of you will have a seat at the table,” announces Osher, who conveniently forgot to mention all of them were either exiled, widowed or beheaded.
The Bachelor might be a competition to win one man’s heart, but this episode was more of a tournament in how to lose one’s dignity, with the girls literally falling over themselves to catch a bunch of sprinting piglets.
Matty dubbed Leah the best ‘pig-catcher’ (thanks?), playing right into her plan of doing ‘’whatever it takes to win’’, which happens to involve stealing the Bach away when he’s having a one-on-one with another woman.
But hey, it’s a tactic that seems to be working, with the show’s villain being handed a rose and Akoulina burned at the stake going home empty handed.
Until next time!
Can’t get enough of The Bachelor? Recap the last two episodes here:
The Bachelor 2017 episode two
The Bachelor 2017 episode one
Photos supplied by Channel 10 and gif by news.com.au
Article written by Alison Donnellan