There are many Wedding Traditions we’re willing to break these days, but women proposing to men seems to be the one clinging to life. For all you modern minded women out there, the statistics are clear. An American study says that 75% of people think it’s fine for women to get down on one knee, but only 1 in 20 women actually do. And this isn’t something that’s changing – it’s been that way for a long time!
But, there’s actually a long history that addresses women proposing. According to an old Irish legend, February 29th is the day! St Bridget made a deal with St Patrick once every four years that allowed women to pop the question. In fact, in some cultures, a man was expected to pay a penalty if he refused this proposal. In many European countries, he had to buy her 12 pairs of gloves – letting her hide the embarrassment of not having an engagement ring!
That’s a long time ago though and no woman should be embarrassed about not having an engagement ring. In fact, for us, there’s only one good reason that you shouldn’t propose to your guy! See Friends and Monica’s teary proposal to Chandler. But if you’ve got a good waterproof mascara? There’s no excuse.
Sure, tradition is an important fact and we know there are a lot of people out there who could never consider this. A lot of those people could even be guys who want to make sure that your proposal is story book perfect. We get that. But if you’ve got the guy? Seal the deal. He’s perfect in every other way and you’re a modern woman, so there’s no need to wait around for him.
Of course, the same rules apply for you ladies as they do for men. You need to sound him out – if he’s a traditional kind of guy, we’ll admit this may not be your best move. He might take you proposing as a challenge to his manliness and that won’t end well for either of you! But he might not be ready to get engaged and you won’t get far by forcing the issue on him. Remember, just because you’re ready, it doesn’t mean that he is. A study by Pew Research Center has found that 67% of men think it’s important to be financially secure before you get engaged. But only 33% of women feel the same way. If you want to spend the rest of your life with this guy, then you need to respect how he feels too. Proposing to your guy shouldn’t be about the fact you want to get married or that you fear he won’t ask you soon. It should be a mutual feeling and a genuine expression of how you feel about each other.
But if he’s just as modern as you are? Ladies, it’s time. Get those thinking caps on, that speech written and kneeling in those heels. We know you can do it! Just make sure you do something that he will appreciate. You might have your dream proposal in mind (we’re seeing rose petals here) but this might not be his. This is about him and it’s your chance to make him speechless. Do it right. Be warned – you will probably get some criticism for taking this step, but blow them all away with a picture perfect story. It will shut everyone up.
One final note though – for all you out there who know your guy won’t appreciate the sentiment? We’ve got a tip for you! When he does pop the question, consider surprising him a few days later with his very own engagement ring. The mangagement ring is definitely a thing and it still gives you the opportunity to tell him what he means to you.