Do not get married until you ask your partner this

He’s popped the question and the Wedding date’s been set, but before you walk down the aisle, there’s an important conversation that every Bride-to-be must have.

Here are the nine questions you need to ask your partner before the Big Day.

1. Is There More Than Just Love?

Unfortunately you need more than just ‘love’ in a marriage. You need to be able to work together, compromise, disagree and enjoy each other’s company.

2. What’s Your Love Language?

Your ‘love language’ is the way that you like to be shown affection. Whether it’s with words, gifts, acts of service, touch or time; you need to work out what you crave and also what your partner craves most out of the relationship.

3. Do You Want Children?

Never just assume that your partner wants kids, because once you’re married, the heartache of wanting children when your husband doesn’t is huge.

4. What Would be a Perfect Marriage to You?

If his idea of a perfect marriage is back-packing around the world or converting to an obscure religion, then you need to know. Talk through what each of you want from the marriage and discuss your future.

5. Are There any Deal Breakers?

Is there anything in his life that is ‘non-negotiable’? For example, if you got a new job overseas, would he move with you, or is that a deal-breaker. You should know each other’s limits on the tricky subjects before you start negotiating.

6. What Activities Can Be ‘Ours’?

All couples should have two or three activities that they do together regularly. These could be playing on a sporting team together, having a weekly movie date or having your own special picnic spot. These are the types of traditions that will continue long into the marriage.

7. What Are Your Priorities?

Everyone has different parts of their life that are important and it’s essential to know your Groom’s. Is his work or health more important? Is he closer to his family or friends? Knowing this will mean you can have better insight into his decisions and choices further down the track.

8. Do You Want Joint Accounts?

The ‘money’ discussion is never fun, but it’s so important to know where each of you stand financially. Who earns what? Who pays for what? Are you both saving? Should you have joint accounts?

9. How Do You Fight?

Understanding what happens when you disagree or fight with each other is important. Once you know how you both react, you can work with each other to find a happy medium. For example, if he closes up and tried to ignore the problem, but you want to discuss it asap, you need to compromise. Maybe agree to leave the topic for 24 hours and then meet at the local park or sit at a café and talk it out.

Main image from Tara and Nick’s wedding. Photography by Istyle Photography.

Posted in Expert Advice, Planning, Relationships, Single Ladies by wedded wonderland

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